Polite Dissent

The battle is over and one of the brother had emerged victorious. But can Dr. Dale prove which brother is the real son, and which is adopted? Today: the exciting conclusion of Jungle Doctor: Who Will Be Chief?

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Batman #644 “War Crimes Part 4: Judgment at Gotham”
Bill Willingham, writer
Giuseppe Camuncoli, penciler

According to Alexander Pope’s Essay on Criticism: A Little Learning is a Dangerous Thing.

Batman illustrates this concept perfectly in the recent Batman #644. Black Mask has been shot in the face with acid by the Joker. Remembering from his “grade school chemistry” that bases neutralize acids, Batman sprays the Black Mask with an alkali solution (i.e. a base) to counteract the acid.

It is true that equivalent amounts of an acid and a base will react to form water and a salt (not necessarily table salt, but any one of a number of chemical salts). The key word here is “react.” This neutralization is a chemical reaction that generates a tremendous amount of heat. Trying to neutralize a chemical burn in this manner causes thermal burns in addition to the chemical burns. The proper way to treat an acid burn is prompt irrigation of the wound with a large amount of water. Studies have conclusively proven that attempting to “neutralize” a chemical burn does far more damage than just irrigating it with water.

Additionally, you’ll notice Batman sprays the Black Mask with quite a large amount of the base. Although acids have the bad reputation, alkali solutions are often more damaging than acidic ones (just ask any cement worker about lime burns). Acids cause a rapid scarring of the skin and this prevents deeper damage. Bases, on the other hand, have good tissue pentration and because of this they cause a great deal more damage. For example, 2 to 3 hours of irrigation are typically used to treat an acid burn while twelve hours are required for an alkali burn. (This also shows the flaw in Joker’s plan for the acid dart to “burrow into the brain.” The formation of scar tissue would prevent that from happening).

So not only did Batman cause more damage to the Black Mask by trying to chemically neutralize the acid instead of washing it away, the base he sprayed on the Black Mask has the potential to be more dangerous than the Joker’s acid ever was.

The exciting adventures of Dr. Frank Dale continue in this second Jungle Doctor story (that is, the second story that I have…there may be more). Honestly, this adventure, Dangerous Waters, pales in comparison to the previous adventure. I think the artist realized this, hence the much lower panel count.

This story is from Dr. Kildare #7. Artist and writer unknown.

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Can Dr. Dale and his “assistant” Bob help rescue the natives? (Natives who speak perfect English deep in the heart of Africa…)

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Damn those branches! Always sneaking up on innocent physicians!

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As usual, Polite Dissent was a frequent stop for people searching for Hawk and Dove, Bwana Beast, Dave Trampier and Kim Possible. Some of the more interesting searches this month (with my comments in italics):

• anxious vigilante - The worst type of vigilante. You never know if they’re going to shoot the criminal or a passerby.
• ornithopters fiction - I know Michael Moorcock used them in his writings, especially in the Hawkmoon series.
• hawk and dove homosexual comic - You do realize that the only time Hawk and Dove haven’t been siblings, they’ve been boy/girl, right? You’re either misinformed, or need some serious help.
• medical term for tricycle antidepressants - We tend to call them tricyclic antidepressants, not tricycle. Try searching for that.
• medical terminology for poison ivy - It’s a type IV hypersensitivity reaction (a type of allergy). Old — but still fashionable — terms for poison ivy include rhus dermatitis and toxicoderma dermatitis (from it’s scientific name).
• best anime openings - I like Witch Hunter Robin, Gunsmith Cats, Martian Successor Nadesico and Full Metal Panic best, though I still have a soft spot for Starblazers, with the asteroids circling the ship while the music starts.
• Medical show with Ben Casey - Umm…how about Ben Casey?
• med school disease - This occurs when a medical student is convinced that they have whatever disease they’re currently studying in class.
• the gift of the magi climax - She gives him a watch fob and he gives her a set of brushes.
• superman for the animals - Please, let’s never mention this again.
• orginal bat-girl - Betty Kane, the niece of Kathy Kane (Batwoman). She’s been ret-conned as Bette Kane, Flamebird.

As Dr. Dale has discovered, Dangerous Waters run deep and fast. Can faithful lackey assistant Bob rescue the good doctor?

This is the final installment of the adventures of Jungle Doctor…well, for now at least (it’s all I have).

Click on the panel for the full page of Jungle Doctor

I’m going to step away from my chronological review of Hawk and Dove appearances to take a look at Teen Titans #27. The chronological review will return soon with a consideration of Hawk & Dove #4 (as soon as I can find which moving box I packed that series in).

Teen Titans #27 was the first half of a two-episode stint on the Teen Titans by Gail Simone and Rob Liefeld. I’ve been looking forward to this storyline because it is written by one of my favorite writers and features Hawk and Dove, characters that I am particularly fond of. It also features Kestrel, their arch-villain. I was also looking forward to Liefeld’s pencils as he was the first artist to tackle the Hank Hall/Dawn Granger Hawk and Dove team way back in 1988.

Overall, the issue is a good read. The characters are written well, the plot is intriguing and the dialogue is clever. There is an underlying theme of “Father’s Day” but it never threatens to overwhelm the story and serves to tie both the heroes and villains together. Robin’s reactions were to be expected from someone who recently lost a parent, and I liked the way the rest of the team came together — even participating in activites that they didn’t particularly care for — to help Robin through the difficult day.

It’s always a pleasure to see Hawk and Dove in action. Other than an occasional glimpse here and there, not much has been seen of them since their series ended (and Armageddon 2001). This is only the second appearance of the new Hawk, Holly Granger. I, for one, would like to see some more back story on this previously unmentioned sister of Dove (Dawn Granger).

Gail Simone does a good job of establishing Kestrel as a formidable villain. She has pulled together all the little bits of his past hinted at in his previous appearances and forged them into a solid antagonist. Kestrel first appeared in the 1988 Hawk & Dove mini-series and was designed to be the evil opposite of Hawk and Dove (you’ll notice that his outfit is purple, a combination of Hawk’s red and Dove’s blue). An agent of Chaos, his task was to bring Hawk fully over to Chaos’s side. He showed up again in issues #14-#17 of the Hawk & Dove ongoing series. At that time, his ability to jump into new hosts was shown, as was the fact that his claws could cut through dimensional walls. He is arrogant, strong, agile, clever and fully amoral — in other words, a good villain.

As for the art, I think the best way to describe it is to think of Rob Liefeld as Bull Durham’s Nuke LaLoosh (the Tim Robbins character). He has the desire and ability to play ball/draw comics well; he just needs the stern guidance of Crash and Annie to actually pull it off (and maybe some women’s underwear). Seriously, I do enjoy Liefeld’s art when it’s done right. His early art, particularly on Hawk & Dove and the New Mutants was quite good. His later efforts became self-parodies. He needs someone over his shoulder helping with plotting and pointing out continuity errors. And he should never, ever ink his own work. (And I defy anyone to explain the first two pages to me: It’s Robin! He’s flying! No, he’s falling! No wait, he’s on a rope! But the rope isn’t attached to anything! Never mind, he landed!)

If you’ll permit me a little bit of fanboy whining:

• A note to all DC writers, please remember that Hawk and Dove can only change into costume when danger is nearby.
• Kestrel can only “sniff out” Hawk and Dove when they’re in costume and not when they’re in their civilian identities. For example, after his battle with Kestrel at the Smithsonian (in the 1988 Hawk & Dove miniseries), a wounded Hawk was able to escape by turning back into Hank; Kestrel could no longer find him. Thus, as long as Dawn and Holly had stayed Dawn and Holly Kestrel could never have found them.

I had planned on posting my final thoughts on Batman #644 tonight, but the real world intervened and I’m off to provide medical triage for some New Orleans evacuees who should be landing in to our local airport shortly.

Expect a double post Thursday night.

Last night, I was one of two physicians on hand as a plane full of New Orleans evacuees landed at our small airport. Our clinic provided 5 people (2 physicians, a physician’s assistant, a nurse, and a medical assistant) and our senior physician was in charge of the medical operations on site. Our job was primarily one of triage — deciding which patients need medical care and how quickly — rather than hands on medical care.

People straggled off the plane one or two at a time, clutching plastic bags filled with toiletries and other belongings. Several people held on to their cats and dogs tightly as well. As they stepped into the terminal, we’d give them a quick medical look-over and make sure they were doing OK. Volunteer greeters came up and directed each passenger and family to food and water and helped them fill out the necessary forms. After that was accomplished, they were taken to the first floor for more food and then loaded on buses to take them to their lodgings.

The evacuees were amazing. There was no evidence of the desperation that had been mentioned on TV so much. They were polite, well-behaved and did a tremendous job looking out for each other. I can only hope that I’ll have that much presence of mind in a similar situation. In fact, most of them had just been rescued from the city that morning or the day before and had no idea which airport they would be ending up at.

Medically, things went smoothly. As soon as the plane taxied to the terminal, an advance team consisting of our physician’s assistant and medical assistant went aboard. They conferred with the Sky Marshals and started sending out passengers a few at a time. The Marshals were excellent at identifying people with medical concerns and these were brought to the attention of the physicians in the terminal. Even after all the evacuees had disembarked, we continued to circulate and talk with them. Several medical issues did not become apparent, or were not mentioned, until well after the plane had landed.

We used a three-tiered triage system. The first tier was medical emergencies. These patients were sent immediately by ambulance to the nearest emergency room. The second tier consisted of patients who needed medical care, but weren’t true emergencies. These patients were sent to one of the local hospitals for evaluation and treatment that night. The third tier were the evacuees who did not need medical treatment at that time. This was by far the largest group. They were sent on to their lodgings, but a free medical clinic would be available for them the next morning.

We had one medical emergency: a patient who complained of chest pain. She was immediately transported to the ER. Fourteen other patients were ultimately sent to the hospital for evaluation as well. There were several patients with infected wounds or sores, a few fractures and at least one sickle cell crisis. We were aggressive in sending patients for further medical care, including patients that we probably would not have sent under normal circumstances. For example, I would send any patient with an open wound for further evaluation. The water down in New Orleans is nasty, and I suspect most of those wounds were infected.

Someone had been smart enough to arrange for veterinary care, and the veterinarian was the one of the busiest people there. She cared for seventeen cats and dogs, from a three-week old kitten to an eighteen-year-old dog. Many of the animals were dehydrated and needed IV fluids. Several had open sores that required treatment. She was aggressive in immunizing the animals against Bordatella as well.

In less than two hours, over 160 people and nearly twenty animals had been processed, evaluated, fed and sent on to their first clean bed in a week.

Rumor is that we’ll be doing this every couple of days for the next few weeks.

Let’s get this out of the way early: the very idea that Dr. Tompkins would let Stephanie Brown die just to make a point to Batman is ludricous and demeans what had been an outstanding character until that time. There’s simply no way that she would have let anyone die, let alone a patient she knw personally. Plus she knew that the death of a Robin just makes Batman more intense, not less.

Then she “burns her medical license” and runs off to staff an aid station in Africa, but not before setting up a trust fund for Stephanie’s child. In today’s electronic society, burning a license doesn’t accomplish anything. Her license will still be easy to obtain online. And what good is it to set up a trust fund for Stephanie’s child? The baby was given up for adoption years ago and never knew Stephanie. To be brutally honest, Stephanie’s death will have exactly zero effect on the child.

Then Batman tells her Leslie he knows what she did and if she ever practices medicine again anywhere in the world, he’ll turn her in for murder. So someone kills one of Batman’s associates — and admits it — and Batman just lets her go as long as she never practices medicine again? How is justice served in that? It’s a lose/lose scenario.

And what about the medicine? We are told that Stephanie died because medication was withheld. Stephanie was beaten and tortured by the Black Mask. She suffered internal bleeding and several fractures. Those are surgical emergencies, not strictly “medical” ones. No medication is going to fix those problems so I’m not sure what medicine Leslie could have withheld that would have killed Stephanie.

Speaking of Black Mask, since when did it become a race among Bat-villains to see who can get the highest bodycount? It’s sickening. I can understand Joker being a mass murderer — he is psychotic after all. I get disgusted when writers feel they have to develop “street cred” for their villains by having them kill everyone they can get their hands on. First Hush gratutiously killed a boatload of fishermen in Gotham Knights and now Black Mask kills “two armed guards, three civilian bystanders and the presiding arraignment judge.” This was also a stupid move on Black Mask’s part — recent events have shown how upset people get when judges and policeman are killed and he just murdered three of them. He may be a “super villain”, but I find it hard to believe the police wouldn’t start cracking down on all his businesses and business associates in revenge.

• Previous post on Batman #644

A pun cover! When’s the last time you saw one of those? They just don’t do them enough anymore.

Hawk & Dove #4 is a quick and dirty done-in-one story and a nearly perfect introduction to the characters for new readers.

A gang of criminals dressed as John Dillinger and Bonnie and Clyde have been robbing banks throughout the city. Hawk and Dove stumble across one of their robberies, and while they are able to thwart the heist, the criminals escape. The gang has special equipment that allows them to become intangible and they ditch Hawk and Dove by literally driving their car through a wall.

Hank tracks the gang down by figuring that thieves pretending to be 1930s criminals would make their hideout in an abandoned speakeasy. He hangs out with some off-duty police officers who tell him the location of all the old speakeasies. To find the right one, he stands outside each and says “Hawk.” He knows he’s at the right one when he transforms into Hawk, because danger must be present for the transformation to occur. Once he finds the hideout, he calls Dawn, and Hawk and Dove are able to take the gang by surprise.

The story is fast moving and manages to highlight the strengths of both Hawk and Dove. Hank also shows that he has some brains and is not just a muscle-bound oaf. The Hank-Ren-Dawn love triangle rears its ugly head, with Ren convinced that Hank loves Dawn while Dawn tries to convince her otherwise. The Kesel and Kesel writing is engaging and light-hearted while Greg Guler and Scott Hanna provide their usual outstanding art.

Today’s the day.

The cable people should be here this morning to install cable throughout the house and hook up the cable modem.

About time! This 2 1/2 weeks of dial-up has been killing me!

We now have cable TV and high-speed internet access. We also have several bright orange cables snaking across the yard. I sure hop they come back and trench those in soon.

Spent today hooking up a wireless network so the PoliteWife and I don’t have to share computers anymore. It was a long process. The LinkSys router hooked up easily, but the wireless receiver I picked up for her computer kept rebooting it. I would unplug the receiver and everything would work fine, but about 10 seconds after I plugged it back in the entire system would reboot. I finally gave up, returned it to the store and picked up a PCI-card receiver. That worked fine and the network is set.

Now in a week or so I’ll pick up a receiver for the Xbox…

A few days ago, a new patient came into the clinic for evaluation. He was a pleasant older gentleman in generally good health. He was on two medications for his blood pressure, both generic. He was also taking some over-the-counter nutritional supplements and herbal “medications.” This is not uncommon, many of my patients take vitamins and supplements. What was shocking was the number of these supplements he was taking: thirty six.

Thirty-six supplements, and many of them several times per day. This just boggles the mind. Let’s take a quick look at why this isn’t a good idea:

• The sheer volume of medications: That’s a tremendous amount of pills to take daily.
• The cost: Those medications aren’t cheap. Assuming $10 per vitamin per month, that’s $360 a month (and that’s a conservative estimate). That’s 18 times the cost of the prescription medications he’s on. That’s a car payment.
• Efficacy: Most of the pills he’s taking have never been demonstrated to have any medical benefit. A few do offer benefits to a select patient population but he’s not one of these patients. He’s paying out the nose and taking handfuls of pills for no benefit.
• Quality: Study after study have shown that many of these supplements don’t contain all the herb they’re supposed to. Some only contain half or one-third the dosage claimed on the bottle. Some contain none.
• Risks: Vitamins and supplements are not risk free. Due to the less-than-stringent reporting requirements, it’s hard to fully appreciate the risk. Several supplements have been shown to be downright dangerous (such as beta carotene in smokers) and recent studies place some suspicion on both Vitamin E and Vitamin B-6.
• Interactions: With 36 supplements (plus 2 prescription medications), there’s bound to be some interaction between the medications.
• Side Effects: No medication or supplement is “side effect free.” Every pill, every tablet, every drop has the risk for side effects. He was experiencing several of the common ones: dry mouth? check. Stomach upset? check. Insomnia? check.

Sadly, these always seem to be the patients who complain about the cost of prescriptions and say that they don’t want to take any more pills. If they’d just cut back on the over-the-counter supplements they’d take fewer pills, save money and feel better overall.

Grand Rounds this week are being held at Sneezing Po. Stop by and checkout the best of medical blogging. There are a tremendous number of excellent articles this week, covering everything from money to drugs to Katrina. It’s definitely worth your time.

I don’t do a great deal of link-blogging, but as I was sitting around donating blood yesterday, I decided it would be a good time to look once again upon the wonderful world of comic books and …well…blood. Here’s a selection of fun reads, from blood being responsible for super powers, to blood in comic book ink (and the inevitable demonic possession that follows), to Superman and “alternative medicine,” and finally a look at what our government talks about in offical meetings.

• I know I’ve posted this one before, but it’s too good to pass up. Is Superman’s blood responsible for every super-hero ever? This author thinks so.
• In a similar vein, here’s an article looking at Clark “Hugo” Kent and Superboy and Supergirl. It tries to tie together Siegel and Shuster Superman, Wylie’s Gladiator and much of the Silver Age superbooks.
• From Snopes, is the blood of the band KISS really mixed in with the ink in their first comic book? (No mention of the late Mark Gruenwald and the Squadron Supreme TPB at Snopes, though here it is mentioned in the sidebar of an HBO article on Six Feet Under). According to the conspiracy-minded Jack Chick wannabe Last Trumpet Newsletter, these comics are occult and pure evil!
  

  This nation has developed an insatiable appetite for the occult. One example is the popular demand for a special edition comic book printed with ink that was mixed with the cremated ashes of the author, Mark Gruenwald. The Canton Company made the special ink for the printing of “Squadron Supreme.” (12) This is reminiscent of the 1978 comic book published by Marvel Comics printed with ink mixed with a vial of blood from each member of the rock band, KISS. (13) The name KISS is an acronym for “Kings In Satanic Service.” These comics are read by millions of young people, and the special ink mixed with the ashes of cremation or the blood of the living, devil possessed people attracts evil spirits and gives them the right to stay in the homes of those who buy the books.

• Here’s an article from a homeopath claiming to have cured Superman’s “allergy” to kryptonite. (Makes sense: Superman is an imaginary character and the benefits of homeopathy are all purely imaginary)
• A transcript from a Health and Human Services meeting on “Blood Safety and Availability” where they discuss the poor transfusion techniques at Metropolis Hospital.
  

  Well, as part of my due diligence, I pursued to see what other hospitals in the United States were doing as well. And I came across this photograph in the newspapers which showed Superman receiving a blood transfusion. One of my colleagues, upon seeing this, said, “Well, there’s your answer. Superman doesn’t get leuko-reduced blood. There’s no filter in the line.”

  I was chagrined. So I actually called the Metropolis blood center, spoke to the director, my good friend, Jarriel [ph], and I asked him about this, and he said not to worry, pre-storage leukoreduction.

  [Laughter.]

  DR. SNYDER: So that clearly explains why there is no filter. But ever mindful of the FDA guidance, 606.122, paragraph B, to use a filter in the administration equipment, if you look closely, there are 270 micron filters right over there.

  Lest you think, however, that I am biased by my friendship, let me point this out, that this photograph also shows Lois Lane donating double the usual amount of blood and her saying that she’d gladly give it all. She doesn’t want to go on living. So I bring to the FDA’s attention that the Metropolis blood bank may have some conflicts as far as the validity of the donor screening and also their SOP for blood donations.

Update (14 Sep 05 0830): Broken links fixed.

A discussion of the medicine in this week’s season premiere of House is below — but be warned — there are spoilers for the episode as well.

A death row inmate is exercising when he starts to hallucinate. When he goes on to develop a rapid heart rate and respiratory distress, a doctor is called to see him. Upon examining the inmate, Dr. House believes that his breathing is bad enough to require intubation and mechanical ventilation, so he admits him to the hospital.

The team’s initial diagnosis is a drug overdose, but the tests all come back negative for drugs. However, the patient’s blood chemistries show a widened anion gap and a metabolic acidosis. Isoniazid (INH) poisoning is a possibility, but House deduces that the patient has tried to kill himself with an overdose of copier fluid. This copier fluid is 90% methanol, so essentially the patient tried to kill himself with wood alcohol. House sits at his bedside and does shots of high-proof rum with him until the poisoning is cured. Strange but true: Grain alcohol (ethanol) is the cure for methanol poisoning, as well as ethylene glycol (antifreeze) poisoning.

House is convinced that the methanol poisoning is not the only diagnosis the patient has. As Dr. Cuddy tries to dicharge the patient, he develops bleeding from some dead bowel which must be surgically removed. Finally, House realizes that this patient has the zebra-of-all-zebras, a pheochromocytoma (a tumor that releases high levels of adrenalin and similar compunds), and this is to blame for his symptoms. The tumor is removed and the patient returned to prison.

Meanwhile, Dr. Cameron has a young patient with lung cancer. Cameron refuses to admit that it’s lung cancer and runs test after test trying to prove it isn’t. Ultimately, after being lectured by both Dr. House and Dr. Wilson, she must tell the patient the truth: she has inoperable cancer and only six months to live.

The medicine in this episode is mostly sound and while I have a few nit-picks, I have no major complaints.

In terms of nit-picks:

• I’m surprised the inmate didn’t have a severely elevated blood pressure with the pheochromocytoma, and I’m equally surprised that his abdominal surgery went so well since pressure on the abdomen is enough to cause the tumor to release a large amount of adrenalin. This sends the blood pressure rocketing dangerously high.
• The patient got over his respiratory depression remarkably quickly — one minute he’s sick enough to require intubation, and the rest of the time he’s fine. (And why wasn’t the endotracheal tube taped in place?)
• It takes a great deal more alcohol than a few shots to clear that much methanol from the body, and that’s why IV ethanol is generally used.
• I can’t believe they used the tattoo-ink-in-the-MRI urban legend; don’t they watch Mythbusters?
• A chest x-ray is not typically obtained for an anemia work-up. Sure the patient had a persistant cough, but she was in clinic to follow up on her anemia.
• As usual, the Young Guns perform every test themselves and the patients recover remarkably quickly.

Drs. House and Wilson were absolutely right to get on Dr. Cameron’s case for the way she handled her patient. She should have been upfront with her from the start. The tests Cameron was ordering were useless anyway — they could only confirm the patient had cancer, not prove she didn’t. Cameron should have gone for the biopsy at the beginning.

This episode earns a B for the mystery and another B for the solution. The medicine receives an A-. The soap opera aspects, which were virtually absent, earn a C.

Back in May, Loren took an excellent look into Superman’s “super-hearing” over at Suspension of Disbelief. I thought it was time to take a similar approach to Superman’s vision. First up, a look at Superman’s heat vision. Not the science (or lack of it) behind heat vision, but instead a quick look at the physics and physiology of sight.

The key concept is optical infinity. This is the distance beyond which the lenses of the eyes no longer accommodate and the eyes no longer converge (don’t worry, I explain it better in the paragraphs below). In people, optical infinity is just about 20 feet.

When looking at objects closer than optical infinity, the eyes turn a little towards each other; this is known as convergence. The lenses of the eye also adjust for the best focus; this is known as accommodation.

Thus, for objects closer than 20 feet, Superman’s heat vision should converge as well. It should focus on the point he is looking at (or at the very least be closer together than his eyes). If you think back to the episode of the Justice League that featured the Justice Lords, Superman lobotomized Doomsday by frying his brain with his heat vision. Doomsday was pictured with two burn scars on his forehead the same width apart as the distance between Superman’s eyes. Wrong! There should be a single burn, or more likely two very close together (as the beams should converge in the frontal lobe of the brain, an inch or so behind the forehead). Similarly this picture of Superman frying Shrapnel from a recent Action Comics is also wrong. The heat vision beams should be convergent, not parallel. Think of all the innocent bystanders being fried behind Shrapnel…

At distances greater that optical infinity, there is no accommodation and the eyes do not converge. We see a single image but that’s because our brain is excellent at converting the input from two eyes into a single picture. At distances greater than 20 feet, the beams of Superman’s heat vision would not converge, but would instead be two parallel beams (you’d think this could cause a lot of problems if he’s trying to target a single small item). Thus this picture from the Overpower game is wrong, as it shows convergent beams when they should be parallel.

Of course, the usual comic book disclaimer that we’re dealing with a Krytponian and not a standard human applies, but still: physics is physics.

Superman’s vision is incredible. Not only can he see an object that is hundreds — or even thousands - of miles away, but he can also see microscopic organisms such as bacteria and viruses with his super vision. Today is a second look at Superman’s vision, focusing on his telescopic and microscopic abilities.

The retina is the layer of photoreceptor cells that make up the very back of the eye. In many ways, the retina works like a digital camera*. The photoreceptor cells are like individual pixels, and the brain puts all these pixels together to make a single image.

The difficulty with looking at objects a great distance away is that these objects appear so small they don’t take up much retinal “real estate” (only a few pixels) and we can’t get a good image of them.

On the other hand, with microscopic vision, Superman’s looking at objects that are smaller than the photoreceptor cells themselves — smaller than the pixels — so there’s no way he should be able to get an accurate or clear image.

As I see it, there are 3 ways around this:

1. Superman’s photoreceptor cells may be smaller than usual. This would allow him a finer resolution, especially with regards to distant objects and tiny objects.
2. The cornea and lens of his eye may be extremely adjustable, functioning as a zoom lens or a macro lens. He may even have more than one lens (much like microscopes and telescopes do), but then actual physics and optics play more of a role and make that unlikely.
3. We could just say he’s Kryptonian and leave it at that.

---

*The digital camera analogy is an oversimplification, but it makes it easier to understand how the eye works. However, unlike digital cameras in which each pixel is identical, there are two distinct types of photoreceptor cells in the retina (rods and cones) and they both serve different functions. Rods are more numerous (120 million) and are good for low light situations and for looking at moving images. There are fewer cones (about 8 million), but they are important because they provide color vision and are better at fine details. There are three types of cones (red, green and blue) and they only respond to that particular color of light. The brain puts all these red, green, blue and black/white “pixels” together and that’s what allows us to see.

• Excellent site on the anatomy & physiology of the eye
• An extremely complete listing of eye resources on the internet

In Hawk & Dove #5, both of our heroes take a day off. Dawn is at home, sick in bed, having caught the flu from her pre-dawn plunge in the Potomac River in Hawk & Dove #3. Hank, on the other hand, has gone to the beach for a day of fun in the sun with Ren.

Sniffling and sneezing in bed, Dawn is being cared for by her father. He gently scolds her for sneaking out that night. After he leaves, Dawn is astonished to see Don Hall, the original Dove. He sits down on the bed next to her and the two of them talk. She apologizes for killing him. He brushes her apology aside, telling her that it was a brick wall that killed him, not her. He tells her that she makes a much better Dove than he ever did — she stands up to Hank, does more with the same powers, and she looks much better in the costume. He then disappears and Dawn in left to wonder whether he was ever really there.

Meanwhile, Hank and Ren are enjoying a day at the beach when an over-muscled beach bum starts hitting on Ren. He shoves Hank aside and literally picks up Ren. Enraged, Hank changes to Hawk and punches back. Unfortunately for him, this is no ordinary beach bum. Instead, this is a metagene-enhanced beach bum who goes by the name Sudden Death. Oh yeah, and he explodes when struck. He and Hawk have a grand battle, with Hawk initially taking more damage than he’s giving. Then he seizes upon the idea to “overload” Sudden Death so he hits him until he’s ready to explode and then keeps punching him and punching him before ditching him in the water where he harmlessly explodes. One more punch and Sudden Death is unconscious and ready for the SCU to arrest while Hank and Ren walk off into the sunser. “Look, Ren,” Hank explains. “Sometimes the right thing to do is the wrong thing to do — you know what I mean? gives you an edge. Makes you unpredictable. An’ I’m better at doing the wrong thing than almost anybody!” A little foreshadowing maybe?

This is one of my favorite issues of the series. Hawk’s explosive fight stands in stark contrast with Dawn’s thoughtful discussion with Don. The overall plot of the series is advanced in that we get the first hint of what Hawk looks like under his costume. The past is also addressed: Dawn’s talk with Don brings closure to his role as Dove and his approval further legitimizes the new Hawk and Dove team.

The art by Chris Wozniak (with inking assist from Karl Kesel) is impressive. Wozniak has very clean and expressive lines and they do a good job with both the quiet scenes and the action-filled ones. Whatever happened to him? He did this issue of Hawk & Dove and a few early “cross-time” issue of Excalibur, but then what? I always liked his style.

Comic books are full of origin stories that seem remarkably dangerous — like taking an unshielded ship up into space, for instance. But every once in a while, a story comes along that is so ludicrously dangerous that it defies belief.

The tale of Hydroman is one of these stories…

Chemist Harry Thurston is in his lab mixing a compound that is composed of water, sulfuric acid, alcohol and some unknown chemical. The beaker he is mixing it in suddenly explodes and the mixture spills onto his hand.

Bizarrely, his hand turns into a waterspout.

He calls his friends Bob Blake and Joyce Church who rushe over to help. While Bob is in the lab, an entire bucket of the mysterious mixture is dumped on him and he turns into a geyser.

Luckily, some “counteractive chemicals” are on hand and Bob is returned to his natural form. Then Harry says, “Hey, Bob. Let’s inject this strange mixture into your blood stream.”
“OK. Sounds like a good idea,” says Bob. (I may be paraphrasing just a little).

So let me get this straight: Harry has just invented this mysterious mixture that turns people into water. He hasn’t had it for more than 5 or 10 minutes when he decides that this dangerous chemical would be perfect to inject into someone’s veins. Nevermind the fact that it in all likelihood it will probably kill them. And his buddy agrees. No research, no testing, no “Hey wait! Your damn chemical turned me into a puddle of water just a few minutes ago!” No, Bob just says, “Sure thing.”

It’s not all bad…there’s some nice Bill Everett art. But please, if you learn nothing else today, please remember that no matter what anybody else tells you, injecting strange chemicals into your bloodstream is never a good idea.

---

Hydroman made his debut in Reg’lar Fellers Heroic Comics #1, published by Eastern Color in August, 1940. Story and art by Bill Everett.

The Comic Book Drug Reference is now up to 83 unique entries and I’m adding more every week. It’s currently at four pages butI think I’m going to have to give Transmetropolitan its own page soon. I’ve started to add more Golden Age references and I’ve finally gotten around to adding those medications and formulas without specific names (such as “Hank McCoy’s Mutation Formula” or Curt Connor’s “Lizard Serum”).

I know I’m still missing some obvious ones (Sandman’s sleeping gas, Lyle Norg’s invisibility serum and Peter Parker’s six-armed spider serum for example), but if you have any suggestions please feel free to e-mail me. (And as always, the CBDR can be found in the sidebar to your right, under “Special Topics.”)

Anon, it be that day that be loved above all others: Talk Like A Pirate Day!
Being the good buccaneer that I am, I stole last year’s post, and I be re-posting it (with some additions though matey).

• Talk Like A Pirate Day Official Website
• Download the official Talk Like A Pirate Day Theme mp3 — only 99 ¢ — and it’s from Tom Smith, so you know it’s good! (And for those of you a little low in swag, here are the lyrics)
• Git yer own pirate name, ya’ land lubbers! Pirate Name Generator
• Methinks the Truth be Out There: Pirate and Privateer Legends!
• Some comic-book pirates (and pirate comic books) off the top of me head (to be updated as I think of more):
  • Crossbones
  • The Psycho Pirate
  • Occulus from Fantastic Four
  • And in the Fantastic Four’s first encounter with Dr. Doom (FF #5), The Thing ended up becoming Blackbeard.
  • Pirate Club
  • The evil pirates from My Monkey’s Name is Jennifer
  • The Starjammers
  • The hilarious Scurvy Dogs (”The cow says moo…”)
  • Barbarossa and the Lost Corsairs
  • El Cazador
  • Street Angel #2
  • Long John Silver and the Pirates (Charlton comic from the 1950s)
  • Belit (and Conan, for a time) from the Conan comics (older Marvel volumes)
  • The Black Pirate appeared in some of the 1940s issues of Action Comics
  • There was the pirate comic-within-a-comic in Watchmen (Tales of Black Freighter)
  • Buccaneers from the 1950s
  • The similarly named Buccaneer, also from the 1950s
  • The Golden Medallion, a pirate comic book put out by LEGO
  • The Pirates of Dark Water A kids comic put out by Marvel based on the Hanna-Barbera cartoon.
  • Terry and the Pirates. Sure it was a comic strip, but it’s been reprinted in comic book form several times
  • Then of course there’s Colonia (pointed out to me last year by Laura, the “Scourge of the Seattle Seas”)
  • Pirate Corp$
  • Even Mickey Mouse is getting in on the act: Air Pirates Funnies
  • Metrokitty (the “Feline Felon”) reminded me that there was a pirate as a suporting character in the Starman series (and in one of the Talking with David issues).
  • Speaking of Disney, we can’t forget air pirate Don Carnage from Talespin
  • Pirates appeares in at least one Spirit story
  • EC’s Piracy
  • Indiana Jones and the Sargasso Pirates
  • Some pirates appeared (briefly, before being slaughtered) in Grendel: War Child #4

Local#1
By Brian Wood and Ryan Kelly

It’s not often that I do an actual comic book review, so I’ll make this short and sweet. I’ll hit the key points, paying special attention to what makes a comic a comic (hint: sequential art and good storytelling).

The story: Pulling up in front of a small town pharmacy, a young woman finds herself in a difficult situation. Her boyfriend has forged a narcotic prescription and now wants her to walk into the pharmacy and get it filled.

The writing: As readers of Demo already know, Wood’s writing is very crisp. His dialogue is believable and he is one of the better writers at getting the reader into the character’s head.

The art: Very clean. Kelly does an excellent job with facial expressions which are key to this story. His segues in particular are partiuclarly well done.

Do the story and art complement each other? Yes, very well.

Does the story move forward? Yes. The character has progressed by the end of the story.

Is it “decompressed storytelling”? Thankfully, no.

Would I read the nexy issue? Yes

The 52nd edition (one year!) of Grand Rounds is being hosted over at Sound Practice. Grand Rounds is a weekly compilation of the best medical blogging on the web. It’s always a fascinating read, so get over there and check it out!

This week’s House? Spoilers and discussion below…

This was probably my least favorite episodes of House. The medicine was suspect, the pathos cloying, and the soap opera missing. And enough with the false dilemmas already!

Andie is a 9 year-old with alveolar rhabdomyosacrcoma, a terminal cancer. She experiences a hallucination at home and is brought to the hospital for evaluation. She is run through an entire battery of tests, some very invasive, and all are normal. Well, except for her oxygen saturation (the amount of oxygen in her blood) which House notices is slightly low. This convinces him that Andie has a tumor in either her heart or lungs. More tests are done which are again normal, and finally she goes to surgery where a tumor is found in her heart. The tumor is discovered to be benign (not cancerous), so that cannot explain her hallucination. Chase notices that Andie has suffered a a retinal bleed, so House deduces that she has a clot in her brain. House decides that the only way to find this clot is to chill her body to 21° Celsius (about 70° Fahrenheit) , stop her heart, remove two liters of blood, add the 2 liters of blood back while performing an MRI to find the clot, and then restart the heart.

The medicine was extremely questionable. If Andie has a tumor in her heart large enough to lower her oxygenation and damage her mitral valve, then it definitely would be seen on an echocardiogram, CT or MRI; it wouldn’t show up for the first time during surgery. That whole stop-the-heart scene? While it’s not my area of expertise, it seemed mighty fishy to me. Also, why would you use a metal bracket and bolt on a patient who’s going though an MRI — a magnetic instrument? Frankly, when the episode started off with House taking ten times the maximum dose of Benadryl, I knew we were trouble.

The writers were trying way too hard for emotion. It was one of those “Tonight, on a very special episode” nights. The dying girl begs Chase for a kiss. House has a chat with the dying girl, who doesn’t want to die and leave her mother alone. Sniff, sniff, where’s my Kleenex?

What happened to all good the soap opera? This is the second episode of House without any significant interplay between the characters.

This episode gets a middling C for the mystery, a lousy D- for the medicine and a needs-to-be-better C- for the soap opera (or lack thereof).

(Sorry for the lack of links tonight, but there really wasn’t much linkable medicine in this episode. Next week…)

• Previous House reviews

Back when I was posting the Top Ten Comic Book Doctors, I listed Donald Blake at #4. I had in mind a perfect scene from Thor to illustrate the point, but I wasn’t able to scan it in at that time and had to settle for a semi-lame cover just showing Blake.

Two months later I’ve finally had a chance to scan the scene in, so here it is in all its four-color glory:

From Thor #143, words by Lee, art by Kirby (scanned from Origins of Marvel Comics).
Click on the panel for an expanded view.

John Dickering was a chemist who discovered a gas “fifty times lighter than hydrogen.” So what does he do with it? He injects it into his bloodstream. Regular readers (and fans of Manhunter) will remember that Dickering’s plan isn’t particularly clever. Injecting air into the veins will end up causing a blocked blood vessel or a pulmonary embolus, neither of which are good things. What is it about the Golden Age that led otherwise intelligent people to inject strange chemicals in their bodies?

Of course, John’s a chemist and not a physician (in fact, he seems to have a thing against physicians — check out the last panel below), so he goes ahead and injects the gas. Not only does he escape injury, but he miraculously gains super powers: a tremendous jumping ability (almost like flying) and eyes that shoot disintegrating beams (called “dissolvo-vision”).

The Comet was an interesting hero. Like many other Golden Age heroes, he was extremely bloodthirsty. In his first story, he killed every villain without a second thought. Most were disintegrated with his dissolvo-vision, but one was dropped from a mile up. However, unlike most other Golden Age heroes, he was killed in his prime — probably the first super-hero to be killed. His brother then decided to become the super-hero known as “The Hangman” to avenge him, though he had no compunctions about stealing his dead brother’s girlfriend. It’s all about priorities apparently.

The Comet first appeared in Pep Comics #1 (January 1940). He was written and drawn by Jack Cole, who is chiefly remembered today for his creation of Plastic Man (who followed the Comet by about a year and a half).

Hank and Dawn, along with Hawk and Dove, take a trip to Paris in Hawk & Dove #6 and #7.

The mysterious businessman Barter nabs the duo and asks them to perform a favor for him. In return, he will tell them the names of their benefactors: the entities who granted them their power. Hank wants no part of it, but Dawn has a strong desire to know more about their background so she convinces Hank that they should help Barter.

In a well-guarded chateau in Paris, an alchemist count has an old family Bible that Barter wants. He knows that it’s well hidden, but he thinks that Hawk and Dove will be perfect for this job because the Count won’t expect such a potent combination of Order and Chaos. He does recommend that they stay in human form as long as possible because changing into Hawk and Dove will set off the Count’s mystical alarms.

Once in Paris, Hank and Dawn climb over the wall and slip onto the grounds of the estate. They subdue the guard dogs and then sneak into the chateau itself. As a roomful of suits of armor comes to life, Hank changes into Hawk to act as a decoy and draw them away. Dawn sneaks further into the chateau to find the Bible but stumbles into a trapped room. She is able to escape, but not without losing a little blood — blood that is found by the Count and his assistant, an enigmatic woman known as Kali. Kali takes her two tigers and begins stalking Dawn.

Meanwhile, Hawk has disposed of the suits of armor and is attacked by a giant magma monster. He defeats the monster by submerging it in a fountain on the estate grounds. When a mystical barrier prevents him from re-entering the chateau, he climbs to the roof where he is attacked by a flock of gargoyles.

Dawn is still making her way through the mansion. Pursued by Kali and the tigers, she is cornered in a storage room. She dumps a shelf of chemicals on her pursuers and then scrambles into a dumbwaiter. Climbing up the shaft, she emerges in the Count’s laboratory and is quickly captured by Kali. In a weird moment of contradiction, Kali first stops Dawn from talking (telling her that “names have power”), but then convinces the Count to let her talk and explain why she’s there. Unsurprisingly, Dawn uses the chance to turn into Dove and fight back. At that moment, Hawk crashes through the skylight into the laboratory. Looking at a painting on the wall, Dove is able to deduce that the Bible is hidden beneath the courtyard fountain.

The duo escape outside and Hawk topples the fountain. Underneath, nestled in a cache of jewels and gold, is the Bible. They grab the book but are pursued by a giant snake. Hawk fights the snake while Kali confronts Dawn.

Barter’s shop reappears at just the right moment and Hawk and Dove dive through the doorway. They hand the Bible over to Barter. In return, he tells them the names they wanted: Tcharr and Tetraya. It’s clear that he knows more, but he won’t reveal it as the bargain was for the names only. He returns the Hank and Dawn to Washington D.C.

Speaking of D.C., workers are cleaning up the abandoned warehouse that Kestrel used as a hideout. When one of the workers notices a mysterious doorway in the wall, a strange purple and black energy emerges and engulfs him. This worker later shows up at Suds, the bar where Ren works, and passes this energy on to her boss Dugan.

Other Notes:

• Names and Transformations: Because Barter does not represent a danger to them; Hank and Dawn are unable to change into Hawk and Dove while in his store. Later, while sneaking onto the count’s estate, Dawn stops Hank from even saying “Hawk” casually, so apparently just saying the words “hawk” or “dove” in the presence of danger initiates the transformation, there does not need to be any intent.
• Barter mentions that his shop cannot open into magical doorways such as the Count’s chateau, Dr. Fate’s tower, or a “certain sanctum in Greenwich Village.” You just gotta love a comic that includes little fanboy in-jokes like this.
• As of issue #7, this series outlasted the original The Hawk and the Dove series.

Young Mary Thayer needs a blood transfusion or she will die. Unfortunately, she has a rare blood type and there are no donors. Luckily, the Spirit discovers that he has the needed blood type (”Type A-1”) and rushes to the hospital to save her.

What exactly is type A-1 blood?

When we describe a person’s basic blood type, we list two factors: the ABO and the Rhesus. The ABO factor is fairly self-explanatory — this is what determines whether a person is blood type A, B, AB, or O. The ABO blood types were discovered in 1901. The Rhesus factor, usually shortened to “Rh-factor”, describes a person’s blood type as being either negative or positive. By putting the ABO and Rh systems together you get the eight basic blood types: A+, A-, B+, B-, AB+, AB-, O+, and O-. There are other minor factors as well, such as Kell and Duffy, but these only become important in rare circumstances such as transplants.

You’ll notice that the Spirit does not mention the Rh-factor. This is because it was not discovered until 1940, the same year that this issue of the Spirit was published (so this issue was probably written and drawn before the Rh-factor was discovered).

That brings us back to question: What is type A-1 blood? As I see it, there are two answers — one “comic book reality” and one “real-world reality”.

I suspect the Spirit has discovered the Rh-factor on his own. Among his multitude of other skills, he has been shown many times to be a scientific genius. He has undoubtedly noticed that in addition to the ABO factor, there is an second important blood factor. He was able to isolate it and test for it. Instead of calling it “positive” or “negative”, it seems he just numbered it. Therefore, Mary’s type “A-1″ blood is really A- (since we know Mary has a rare blood type and A- is significantly less common than A+).

In the real world, the ABO factor tells us whether certain proteins are on the surface of a person’s blood cells. Type A has A proteins, type B has B proteins and so on. It turns out that there is more than one type of A protein. These subtypes are known as A1 and A2. So saying a person has type A1 blood simply means that they have A1 proteins on their blood cells. Of course, this was only discovered in the last decade, so it seems the Spirit may have been a man ahead of his times.

• A previous look at blood typing in Golden Age comics: Superman #6

Back in Marvel Mystery Comics #19, Toro (the teen sidekick of the Human Torch*) was injured in a fight with a villainess known as “The Hag.” The Torch rushed Toro the hospital where the doctors discovered that he had sustained internal injuries. Despite the best medical care, Toro kept becoming weaker and weaker. The doctors realized that his only hope of survival was to receive a transfusion from the Human Torch. You’ll notice that the Human Torch’s blood is described as flame or live fire and the hospital has to use asbestos tubing (this was years before asbestos was discoverd to cause cancer).

This marks the first time in comic book history that an android (the inaptly named Human Torch) donated blood to save a human. It wasn’t the last time either, at least for the Human Torch. In Invaders #11 his blood was transfused into the injured Jacqueline Falsworth. The android blood combined with the vampire blood already in her system (don’t ask) and gave her super-speed which she used to become the super-heroine Spitfire. She received a second transfusion the Human Torch sometime in the ’90s which restored her youth and powers.

*This is the Golden Age Human Torch, an android who went by the name Jim Hammond, not the second HumanTorch (Johnny Storm of the Fantastic Four).

Ultimate Fantastic Four #23 Crossover, part 3 of 3
Mark Millar, writer
Greg Land, penciler

A quick look at Ultimate Fantastic Four #23 and Sue Storm’s grasp of brain anatomy (or lack thereof)…

Case Study One: The zombie Reed Richards from an alternate dimension has crossed into the Ultimate universe and attacks Ben Grimm. Sue Storm steps in and lays a whammy on Reed.

“[I] just collapsed his left synapse,” she explains. “Brain-damaged him…I just popped an entire chunk of his brain.”*

A synapse is the term for the connection between two adjacent nerve cells. It is across the synapse that information is passed from one nerve to another. There are hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of synapses in the brain, not just a “left” and “right” one. Frying a single synapse would have no affect on someone’s brain, even a zombie brain.

Case Study Two: Sue has arrived with Johnny and Ben on the zombie world to rescue Reed. Faced with hundreds of zombified opponents, she strikes them all blind by turning their optic nerves invisible.

The optic nerve is not involved in the process of turning light into information — that’s the job of the retina. The optic nerve is simply a conduit; its job is to pass information from the retina to the vision centers in the brain. Being invisible would have absolutely no affect on the function of the optic nerve. It would be like turning a lamp cord invisible, the lamp would still work whether or not you could see the cord.

Thanks to Aaron for bringing this issue to my attention

*And I realize I was never an English major, but I don’t think “brain-damaged” is supposed to be hyphenated when used as a verb.