Polite Dissent

We get too many magazines here at the Polite Household. Sure, my wife gets a couple (usually as a grandmotherly Christmas present), but by and large the majority of them are mine. If you think trying to cut back on the number of comics you buy is tough, try cutting back on the number of magazines you get – it’s even harder.

There’s Newsweek and National Geographic, because every household in America is constitutionally obligated to subscribe to both a weekly news magazine and National Geographic. No really, it’s true. I know I read it in the Constitution somewhere.

Then there are the computer and videogame magazines. PC Magazine is honestly useful, though I could do without the in-depth reporting on $3000 business software I’ll never buy. Maximum PC is inexpensive and one of the best resources for updating and upgrading computers.

I’ve cut back to two computer gaming magazines now. For all intents and purposes, they’re entirely identical on the inside. Same reviews, previews and “exclusives.” One provides a more thorough coverage of obscure wargames, and that’s the one I’ll keep – as soon as I remember which one it is (but I’ve been saying that for two or three years now). Does anyone every use those CDs that are bundled with the magazines? They load slowly and rarely contain anything that can’t be found quicker on the web. I wish they would let me renew without the CD (or “beverage coaster” as I like to call them). And to whoever decided it would be a good idea to attach the CD to the middle of my magazine instead of simply including it loosely: you should be shot.

PSM is my choice of videogame magazines. It’s cheap ($12 for 12 issues) and informative, even if it does degenerate to frat boy humor on occasion (but still less often than Wizard).

In terms of comics, I currently receive four magazines. The Comics Journal, Alter Ego and Back Issue are read cover to cover and worth every dime. I also get the Comics Buyers Guide, but the jury’s still out on that one. Let’s just say that I preferred it as a weekly newspaper instead of the monthly magazine it’s become.

I get several woodworking magazines as well. I love woodcraft and would love to spend more time in my workshop. That is, if I actually had a workshop. For some reason, our garage actually contains cars and that limits that amount of industrial-size power tools I can have. I try to throw away the magazines, but then I start thinking: “Wait, that’s the Router Isue! I must keep it!” Or “This issue has that special report on wood staining with linseed oil. You know the minute I throw it away, I’ll have a project that requires a linseed stain!” I think I’ll need to build a bookshelf just to hold my woodworking magazines.

Ironically, we probably receive 2 or 3 trees worth of nature magazines annually. We subscribe to National Geographic, National Geographic Adventure and Illinois Outdoors. The rest seem to arrive whether we want to read them or not. Admittedly, we in the Polite Household tend towards the “green”, so we support a number of nature charities. They are all happy to send a magazine or two (or four) our way. Why is it that environmental charities seem to send the most mail? Isn’t this counter-productive?

I haven’t even touched on the medical journals yet, but that’s a topic for another day (did you know that just by putting an M.D. behind your name you’re guaranteed an additional 4 or 5 magazines a week? And they won’t stop no matter what you do?).