Polite Dissent

I’m off to St. Louis for the weekend (fun! fair! fireworks! family!), but should return on Sunday. I hope everyone else has a fun holiday weekend.
Please remember these important safety tips:

1. Do not put fireworks in any holes where they do not belong.
2. Poison ivy should not be used as toilet paper.
3. Do not pet the snakes.
4. Do not feed the bears, raccoons, or Rob Liefeld.
5. Do not drive if you’ve had more than 2 beers, and do not even attempt to stand if you’ve had any of Aunt Betty’s special fruit punch.
6. Do not play “God Bless the USA” more than two times in a row (there are plenty of better patriotic songs available, so please choose one that does not butcher the English language) (and that does not include Toby Keith’s abhorrent “Courtesy of the Red White and Blue“).